What is Resilience, why is it important and how do we help our kids build it?
Resilience, which is the ability to bounce back from adversity, is known to be associated with fewer mental health problems and is extremely important in the overall well-being of children and teens [1] [2] [3].
As parents, oftentimes we share that our goal is for our children to be happy. We sign them up for sports or activities we think they will like, arrange playdates, and oftentimes act as their social secretaries because we want to give them the best life possible. While happiness is extremely important, and most parents do want their kids to be happy, there is another key factor to putting our children out there in the world. We also want to help our kids develop emotional resiliency. The development of resilience in children involves fostering strong problem-solving skills, teaching them how to cope during stressful situations, and encouraging a positive self-image that does not rely on the way others see them [3]. Like all attributes, some children develop emotional resilience naturally, while others need extra support. By noticing signs of weaknesses in your child's emotional resiliency early and understanding the importance of getting them or yourself help, you can support them in building those skills.
Understanding Resilience in Children
If we understand what emotional resilience in children is, we can then help them build these skills. Resilience encompasses emotional health, physical well-being, and the development of strong relationships and self-regulation skills.
Key components that contribute to a child's resilience include:
1. Protective Factors:
- Connection: A sense of belonging and security within family and community. [5]
- Meaning: Engaging in activities that provide purpose and fulfillment. [5]
- Healthy Thinking: Encouraging optimistic and rational thought processes. [5]
- Wellness:Promoting physical health through adequate sleep, nutrition, and exercise. [5]
2. Environmental and Relational Contributors:
- Exposure to nature. [6]
- Consistent and quality sleep. [6]
- At least one stable relationship with a parent, caregiver, or adult. [6]
3. The 7 C's of Resilience:
- Competence: The feeling of being capable and effective in handling situations efficiently. [6]
- Confidence: A sense of self-assurance and belief in one's abilities. [6]
- Connection: Close ties to family, friends, and community that provide support and love. [6]
- Character: A strong sense of self-worth and confidence in one’s own integrity. [6]
- Contribution: The understanding that the world is a better place because they are in it. [6]
- Coping: Developing strategies to face and overcome challenges. [6]
- Control: Recognizing that they can control the outcomes of their decisions and actions. [6]
These elements collectively foster resilience, enabling children to navigate challenges with greater ease and confidence. Building resilience is a dynamic process that begins from birth and can be nurtured over time through intentional strategies and supportive relationships [9][12]. Parents and caregivers play a critical role in this process, providing the necessary support systems and resources to help children develop the resilience needed to face life's adversities [2][11].
Creating a Supportive and Nurturing Environment
So how can we help? As parents, our job is to keep our children safe and to help them learn the skills necessary to be functioning adults in our society
1. Establishing Stability:
- Implement consistent routines and clear boundaries to provide a sense of security [13].
2. Emotional and Social Support:
- Offer emotional support through active listening and validation of feelings [13].
- Teach them empathy and trust within family and peer relationships through effective communication [13].
- Help them learn how to be an effective part of a community, supporting peers and others and help them to find a sense of belonging [13].
3. Therapeutic and Expressive Activities:
- Help them to learn how to express their emotions and not be afraid of them
- Incorporate exercises to help them to learn how to handle stress effectively [13].
- Engage children in physical activities, hobbies, and time to play to enhance emotional well-being [13].
Oftentimes, these strategies alone can help a child build resiliency. However, sometimes children and families need extra support from a professional. Just like reading and writing, some kids need extra help in regards to building their resiliency skills. If we can help kids develop resilience, we help prepare them to navigate life's challenges with confidence and emotional intelligence [13][14][15].
Encouraging Autonomy and a Positive Self-Image
Starting in toddler years, we want to begin encouraging autonomy in our children. Encouraging autonomy is crucial for their development and self-esteem. Autonomy, is the ability to act according to one’s own ideas rather than the ideas or influence of others. When we teach autonomy to our children, we are teaching them that they have the power to make their own decisions and provide them with some sense of control in a world where they have very little. Some common examples of autonomy in children is toilet training, choosing their own clothes or foods and deciding what toys they want to play with [4]. This sense of control over their decisions fosters a positive self-image and lays the foundation for resilience.
1. Physical Activity and Mental Health:
- Encouraging children to participate in physical activity can be a practical step towards fostering independence and building their self esteem. It also is known to improve a person's overall mood [6].
2. Impact of Resilience on Life Satisfaction:
- By promoting autonomy and allowing children to make their own choices within a safe and supportive environment, parents and caregivers can significantly contribute to building resilience. This, in turn, reduces the risk of long-term mental health issues and promotes overall well-being [2].
Conclusion
As we have mentioned throughout this article, resilience is a vital component for a childs emotional and mental well-being. The emphasis on recognizing early signs of mental health issues and the critical nature of early intervention showcases the paramount importance of being proactive in supporting our children's mental health. If children need support in building emotional resilience, Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and Parent- Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) are two evidence based therapies that provide this support to both parents and children.
Parents and caregivers have a crucial role in helping to build resilience, emotional intelligence and coping skills in their children. By creating a supportive and nurturing environment, encouraging autonomy, and teaching problem-solving skills, we can set our young ones up for success with the tools they need to navigate life's challenges with confidence. The collective effort in implementing these strategies will not only contribute to the mental well-being of our children but also pave the way for a future where they thrive emotionally and psychologically.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
What is the significance of resilience in the context of a child's mental health?
Resilience is crucial for a child's mental health because it provides them with the ability to bounce back from any difficulties or adversity that they will experience. Children who are resilient can move through life building strong and supportive relationships.
Can you outline the 7 C's of resilience as they pertain to children?
The 7 C's of resilience, as identified by Dr. Ginsburg, include competence, confidence, connection, character, contribution, coping, and control. These factors are important in fostering resilience in children. It's important for parents and caregivers to help support the development of resilience in their children.
How does resilience contribute to overall mental well-being?
Resilience is a protective factor against mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. It empowers individuals to manage and adapt to stressors and challenges that could potentially increase the risk of developing mental health conditions. This includes experiences like being bullied or facing traumatic events.
What strategies can be employed to enhance mental resilience in children?
To build mental resilience in children and teenagers, consider these 10 tips:
1. Encourage them to make connections with others.
2. Involve them in activities where they can help others.
3. Establish and stick to a daily routine.
4. Allow them to take breaks when needed.
5. Teach them self-care practices.
6. Help them set and move toward their personal goals.
7. Promote a positive view of themselves.
8. Teach them to keep a balanced perspective and to remain hopeful about the future.
References
[1] - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8500371/
[2] - https://www.psycom.net/build-resilience-children
[3] - https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/resilience/
[4] - https://blog.kaplanco.com/help-children-build-resilience
[5] - https://www.healthyyoungminds.com/teaching-resilience-how-to-build-childhood-resiliency/
[6] - https://www.acc.edu.au/blog/build-resilience-in-children/
[7] - https://www.gottman.com/blog/strengthen-childs-emotional-intelligence/
[8] - https://www.verywellfamily.com/tips-for-raising-an-emotionally-intelligent-child-4157946
[9] - https://teachingbrave.com/kids-resilience/
[10] - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6069421/
[11] - https://raisingchildren.net.au/school-age/behaviour/understanding-behaviour/resilience-how-to-build-it-in-children-3-8-years
[12] - https://mybrightwheel.com/blog/building-resilience-in-children
[13] - https://reggiedford.com/building-resilience-in-children-a-guide-to-nurturing-strength-in-children-who-have-experienced-trauma/
[14] - https://wefixbrains.com/resources/10-tips-to-help-children-build-coping-skills-and-emotional-regulation
[15] - https://empoweringeducation.org/blog/redefining-emotional-intelligence/
[16] - https://www.naeyc.org/resources/pubs/yc/mar2017/teaching-emotional-intelligence
[17] - https://www.researchgate.net/publication/354134828_Resilience_and_mental_health_in_
children_and_adolescents_an_update_of_the_recent_literature_and_future_directions
[18] - https://hqlo.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12955-021-01701-3
[19] - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8303353/
